I’m not sure

I had a very good set at The Good Nite tonight. I wrote out some new jokes on an index card. The crowd was extremely engaged (not because of me, they were like that before I got up). I went last. I was genuinely concerned that I was going to bomb.

I started from a place of expressing that genuine concern and the set went very well.

I am extremely fortunate to be where I am right now; I feel comfortable getting on stage with a few ideas and talking them out and they seem to be entertaining.

But like I’ve told a few friends and Eric over the last year or so, it’s slightly scary or unsettling because I’m not sure what I’m doing. Or rather, I’m not sure why it’s working.

I don’t know if I ever really over-thought this kind of proficiency in improv or acting. I think with improv I just felt after a decade or so of experience that it started to feel easy to me.

Standup doesn’t necessarily feel “easy” to me right now, but I have a very high success rate at the moment. Someone asked me tonight “When is the last time you bombed?” and while I could remember “meh” spots, I don’t remember the last time I actually full-on bombed.

That’s a sign that I should be taking more risks, which I did tonight by working out some brand new jokes.

It’s all going very well.

But I’m not sure why.